There is so much that I want to say to you and so little time. But today, I want to take this opportunity to express my heartfelt sorrow for the way so many mean-spirited conservatives are shamefully trying to make some big thing about your posture before King Abdullah.
I watched both video clips several times and, I have to admit that, even though you seemed to be hinged at the waist, your torso was parallel with the floor, and your face was close enough to lick his shoe, that doesn’t prove that you bowed to Saudi-Arabia’s evil king. I mean, who am I to judge?
On your behalf, your spokespersons have issued an official statement declaring that it was NOT a bow; that you, in fact, were simply looking for the king's hand. That’s a good enough explanation for me, man. I believe you.
And I also believe that O. J. did not kill his wife, that Bill did not have sexual relations with that woman, that the world is flat, and that, even though he looks and walks and talks like one, Donald is not a duck.
Ralph M. Petersen
(emailed to the White House at 8:22 AM, April 10, 2009)